Dear A*

It's been a while since I last wrote to you. I used to write to you quite often and suddenly we got so caught up with our lives, we don't know what happened. These little gestures that used to mean the world to us have turned to rituals we no longer partake in. A while I ago I read back all the letters I sent you from 2 years ago, I think they're rubbish. So here's a really good letter to make up for all the shit letters I've written you from Day 1.

I used to always wonder if I would still call you my boyfriend three birthdays from now and I cringe at the very thought of it. I was always so scared of the future, especially for us, but I would never admit it. Well, not anymore. These days everything seems so boundless and I am so happy for what awaits us next because I know for a fact that no matter what happens, good or bad, we will always have each other to fix us. Today, I'm 3 semesters short of a college diploma. In a few months, you turn 21. Alhamdulillah, I'm so happy for us. For everything that feels right. For how far we've gone. No matter how far I try to run, fate does this funny thing where it takes me back to square one. I can't escape you. My fate won't let me, at least for now, not that I intend on escaping you. I don't.

Life is great with you, A*. It's been all that I've imagined it to be when I was 11 and watched those ridiculously corny local dramas on television only to ask myself "Is this what it's like to have a boyfriend?" You've been more than JUST a boyfriend to me, And if I had to face hell and high waters, I'm glad I did it with your hand in mine. (OK. That was just a figure of speech. I obviously don't intend on going to hell, but I really hope to have a blessed relationship with you; one that brings us closer to the path of our Creator) A*, what I'm trying to say is; I'm so proud of how much we've achieved together. What I have gone through with you, I will never wish to have gone through with anyone else.

I love you so much. I never knew I had the capacity to love anyone that isn't my blood this much. You are the greatest form of Rezeki God has ever given to me and never in a million years would I believe I am ever this privileged. Thank you, A* for all that you have contributed in molding me into the person I have become today. Nobody can ever replace you. For me, it has always been and will always be you.